SYRACUSE, NY—Noting the considerable likelihood that she was currently deep into the story and enjoying it greatly, reports confirmed Tuesday that area girlfriend Melissa Leavitt, 31, is probably reading some book titled The Midwife’s Promise. “Melissa’s been spending a lot of time this week with some new book, so my best guess is that it’s a historical fiction novel called The Midwife’s Promise that takes place in 1820s New England or something like that,” said boyfriend Cameron Scott, 32, corroborating speculation that the book almost certainly features a proud, strong-willed protagonist named Adeline. “Probably it’s about a woman who loses her husband to cholera—maybe typhoid—and has to surmount various hardships in order to build a new life for herself and her children under the backdrop of post-Revolutionary America. It maybe addresses themes of religious faith, a woman’s role in society, the allure of respected gentlemen—that kind of thing. I can tell you it almost definitely has a chapter named ‘The Schoolhouse.’ That’s for sure.” At press time, sources confirmed that the novel was most likely written by an individual who previously authored a book called Corrina’s Garden.

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